Recently my hero, the shamwow guy, was arrested because when he paid a hooker 1,000 dollars to have as he said it, “straight sex,” he tried to kiss her and she retaliated by biting his toungue. Afterwards he smacked her around a little and the police were called.
So not only is your product sub par, made by Nazis and gave me a rash on my butt, but now your spokesman is as much of a womanizer as Babe Ruth. After all these shannanigans I kind of feel like spending 20$ a month on paper towels and throwing all my shamwows away. Thanks a lot Matt Perrone.
